The more I saw of the beauty and glory of God, the more I
was humbled under a sense of my own vileness. I often
repaired to my old place of prayer, and I seldom came
away without consolation. One day this scripture was appli¬
ed to my mind, " And'ye are complete in Him, which is the
head of all principalities and powers." The Lord was pleased
to comfort me by the application of many gracious pro¬
mises at times when I was ready to sink under my trouble.
tc Wherefore he is also able to save them to the uttermost that
come unto God by Him, seeing He ever liveth to make intercession
for them. Heb. x;. 14. For by one offering He hath perfected
for ever them that are sanctified.
My kind indulgent mistress lived but two years after my
master. Her death was a great affliction to me. She left five
sons, all gracious yoimg men, and ministers of the gospel.
I continued with them all, one after another, till they died;
they lived but four years after their parents, when it
pleased God to take them to himself. I was now quite des¬
titute, without a friend in the world; but I who had so often
experienced the goodness of God, trusted in Him to do
what He pleased with me. In this helpless condition I went
into the wood to prayer as usual; and though the snow was a
considerable height, I was not sensible of cold, or any other
inconveniency. At times indeed, when I saw the world
frowning round me, I was tempted to think thar the Lord
had forsaken me: I found great relief from the contempla¬
tion of these'words in Isaiah xlix. 16. Behold I have graven
thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually be¬
fore me. And very many comfortable promises were sweetly
applied to me. The 69th psalm and 34th verse, My cove¬
nant will I not break, nor alter the thing that is gone out of my
lips. Heb. xvi. 17. 18. Phil, *.. 6. and several more.
As I had now lost all my dear and valued friends, every
place in the world was alike to me. I had for a great while
entertained a desire to come to England. I imagined that
all the inhabitants of this island were holy; because all those
that had visited my master from thence were good, (Mr.
Whitefield was his particular friend) and the authors of the
books that had been given me were all English. Butabove
all the places in the world, I wished to see Kidderminster,
for I could not but think that on the spot where Mr. Baxter
had lived and preached, the people must be all righteous.
The situation of my affairs required that I should tarry a